When the Mountain Isn’t Yours

Sandra on core values, self-acceptance, and choosing a different ascent

There is a particular exhaustion that doesn’t come from effort.

It comes from effort spent in the wrong direction.

When Sandra spoke about what stayed with her most from Leadership Landing, she returned, again, to the core. Not as an abstract idea, but as something she felt in her body and mind.

You follow society’s standards.

You keep running with them.

And suddenly you realize you’ve run up the wrong mountain.

What makes this insight powerful is not the metaphor itself

but how quietly it happens.

How we end up climbing mountains we never chose

Most people don’t wake up and decide to live misaligned lives.

They adapt.

They keep going.

They assume that discomfort is part of growth.

Standards tell us what success looks like.

Pace tells us how fast we should climb.

Comparison tells us whether we’re behind.

And somewhere along the way, we mistake endurance for belonging.

Sandra didn’t lack discipline, intelligence, or commitment.

She lacked fit.

When the mountain doesn’t fit your nervous system

Running up the wrong mountain isn’t only about values.

It’s also about neurology.

Some mountains reward constant speed, instant answers, and uninterrupted momentum.

Others require reflection, pauses, and depth.

For a long time, Sandra pushed herself to keep climbing, even when her body and mind signaled strain. When her thoughts paused, she interpreted it as failure. When she lost her train of thought, she became hard on herself.

That wasn’t incompetence.

It was a mismatch between the mountain she was climbing and how her brain actually works.

Returning to the core, and listening honestly

As Sandra moved through the layered work of the program, behavior, stress responses, convictions, values, needs, something became clear:

Her core values and needs were no longer being met in the field she was in.

Not because the field was wrong.

Not because she had failed.

But because the climb itself required her to override herself.

If I wanted to actually start improving myself, and my life as a whole, I would have to start looking at something else.

That realization didn’t come with panic.

It came with relief.

Self-acceptance changes how you choose direction

One of the most visible shifts during Sandra’s journey wasn’t about career decisions.

It was about how she treated herself in moments of pause.

During the interview, when she briefly lost her train of thought, something different happened. She didn’t rush. She didn’t apologize excessively. She named it. She took a breath. She stayed calm.

That moment mattered.

Because instead of interpreting the pause as a loss of worth, she treated it as information, a natural rhythm of how her mind works.

This is where self-acceptance and direction meet.

You don’t recognize the wrong mountain until you stop blaming yourself for struggling on it.

Switching mountains isn’t failure, it’s discernment

There is a quiet courage in saying:

This mountain isn’t mine.

It means releasing the idea that persistence alone makes something right.

It means letting go of identities built on “pushing through.”

It means trusting your inner signals more than external validation.

Sandra didn’t suddenly know exactly where to go next.

She didn’t need to.

She knew enough to stop climbing where she was.

Being accompanied while you reorient

Another insight Sandra named, almost in passing, was this:

There is always someone to help.

Returning to your core isn’t a solo act of willpower.

It’s relational.

Being mirrored.

Being supported.

Being gently helped back when you lose the thread.

Not to give you answers

but to help you hear your own.

The real shift: from endurance to belonging

Sandra’s journey wasn’t about ambition or escape.

It was about alignment.

About choosing a terrain where her values, needs, pace, and neurology could coexist, without self-abandonment.

Sometimes growth isn’t about climbing higher.

Sometimes it’s about choosing a mountain that finally lets you breathe.

🐉 find her full interview here: https://www.avagasso.com/post/sandra-dost-from-self-made-loops-to-self-trust